Bochner Family Adventure

There are three bamboo bridges taken down and rebuilt annually according to the rains. They serve as a pedestrian crossing the Nam Ou River.

This rivers continue to thrive. Raw water runoff flows to it from Luang Prabang and nearby provinces. The runoff courses beside stone walkways built over 100 years ago and sudsy bubbles gather in creeks and streams that feed it. Across Laos illegal and legal mining, deforestation and increased sediment threatens its over all health. The Laotian people depend on this water source for thier very livelyhoods and it absorbs a lot of abuse. I am in awe of the natural system’s resilience. These rivers serve the country as its bathtub, washing machine and at times septic. Yet, fish, plants and wildlife still continue to live and feed the people. Despite being the wash basin for millions, these rivers do not smell putrid or run thick with algae or garbage. I do wonder about the large number of dams built and being constructed. How will these disruptions affect the river’s ability to self regulate? I imagine even these impressive water ways will be pushed beyond their limits.

The above bridge is used by motorbikes in the center lane, the outside for pedestrians. Twenty years ago, when I crossed this bridge on foot, only bicycles passed by. Most people were on foot and we all used the center lane.

Our crossing the Mekong. We got a fisherman to take us over.

Across from the main peninsula of Luang Prabang (where all the tourist infrastructure is) are many every day Lao villages going about life.

Woman takes a walk

Large pot of water boiling precariously over fire

Stand serving lunch

We travelled by bus up the Nam Ou River about four hours north of Luang Prapang back in time. Aside from the additional plastics and synthetic fibers available for sale, much is the same in this part of the world as it was many years ago. In this area are Hmong, Khmu and Lao people who weave silk and cotton, make baskets and live using traditional methods. There is a school in Nong Khiaw and Muang Ngoi and now a health clinic. Our visit to this part of the world was definitely our first step off the well trodden path.

Until 2013 one could take a slow boat all the way to Nong Khiaw, but now there is a hydroelectric dam that is blocking the way and bus or tuktuk is the only route open. Laos is currently constructing over 21 damns and expects to open two new hydroelectric powerplants every year from 2012 to 2022. Painted Chinese characters loom large on the sides of large work trucks and concrete structures built to hold back the land from new reservoirs created by the damns. It is clear who is bank rolling these projects. China has its eye on the future and its hands reach everywhere in Southeast Asia to secure future energy and land needs.

Despite these changes to the Mekong and Nam Ou rivers, the landscape is breathtaking. We spent eight days in Nong Khiaw and then went further North and stayed in an even smaller village of Muang Ngoi that only recently got electricity. Although these villages are not easy for the average tourist to reach, I think that these once quiet villages are going to change fast as the influx of visitors grows. A road is being constructed between Nong Khiaw and Muang Ngoi (now only reached by small wooden boat) and this will allow larger tour vans to reach this area, bring more money and encourage larger infrastructure.

Most of the people in these villages still live very close to the bone, depend on fish from the river and small-scale farming. They create homes and baskets from bamboo, rattan and hardwood. Most use coal and cook over an open fire.

There are chickens and roosters everywhere, as well as pigs, cows, water buffalo and dogs. These animals are truly free range, and I am confident antibiotic and hormone free. Organic? Most likely not as I saw animals often snacking in the free form piles of burning trash. But, definitely local!

We spent our time trekking up steep paths to view points, visiting temples and walking along hot dusty roads to far-flung villages (9 miles in one day). We were fortunate to meet Silver and Tony, a fun loving couple from New Castle England. They shared tremendous stories of travel and offered comic relief, as well as parenting to Addie and Jack. I hope our paths cross again. I am sure they will.

I found that children and adults would love to have their photo or video taken and then see it. I really wished I had a Polaroid camera so I could give them a photo. In many of these homes there are no mirrors.

An average sticky rice basket takes two days to make. This man sold me one for 25000 kip ($3) and I am sure that was the tourist price.

According to our friend Tony, confrontations with water buffalo cause great injury in this part of the world.

Laos is still plagued with a huge number of unexploded bombs thanks to the United States. To develop or build, one must clear the land first for safety. We are learning a lot about this part of the world and the complex relationships Laos has to nearby countries and far. Stay on the path!

Our visit to this Northern oasis has been one of the highlights of our trip! We feel so lucky to be able to see this beauty and witness this little pocket of the world that is trapped in time.

Mixing with our dreams in the early morning is the sound of deep drumming and gongs from outside  This morning I set the alarm for 0450 and set out to observe the Almsgiving ritual.  Originally I stated that there are 33 temples here, but I think that number only refers to the amount in the old part of the city.  There are over 80 in Luang Prabang proper.  Buddhism has been the prominent spiritual belief system of Laotians since the 14th century.  A large part of the male population joins a monastery and becomes a monk for a period of their lives, months or years.  Boys as young as 7 become monks.

The tak bat is a daily morning ritual where monks walk barefooted, single file, with the eldest leading throughout the neighborhood and collect food from the local people.  Women sit on stools or kneel on blankets and place a pinch of sticky rice, fruit or candy in the alms bowls that the monks carry.  The ceremony is done in silence to not disturb the monks meditative silence. However, I did catch some relaxed banter between the local women and the elder monks.  As well, the roosters are vocal at sunrise.

This interaction presents a symbolic connection between the lay Buddhist and the spiritual sentient being, or the Buddhist monk or nun.  The act of giving food to the monks shows a humbleness and respect in the presence of secular society while presenting lay people with the opportunity to make merit.  The monks do eat some of this food at breakfast, but also give it away to needy families in the community.

I walked around Luang Prabang at 5am, not knowing when I would see the monks.  It was dark, rainy and cold.  As I walked throughout the city, I would catch sight of the chanting monks, walking with umbrellas.  I ended up back at the corner of our guest house at about 6:30 where two Lao women sat on stools.  I watched from afar as lines of saffron robed monks passed them and received alms.  I watched as young monks struggled to carry their Alms bowls and stray dogs followed the procession.

I did not get too close or participate in the Almsgiving.  There is already a threat of the city shutting down this ritual as the behavior of some tourists can be very intrusive and offensive.  In my walks I saw the parade of silver vans packed with Chinese tourists speeding to the main walkway near the temple.  As I walked by this temple, even though the monks had not arrived, the din of chatter among the tourists erased any feelings of peace.  On foot, wandering around corners I caught glimpses of townspeople giving Alms.  Taking part in this daily ceremony as they have always done and hopefully will continue to do.  Tomorrow Addie, Jack and Cork will join me at 0630 to observe the Almsgiving ceremony.  As a family we are studying Buddhism.  These real life experiences cement our understanding of this complex spiritual paradigm.  World schooling in action!

Alms receiving Bowl

We decided to take the ten hour bus to Luang Prabang from Nan Thailand as the border crossing involving minibuses, buses, Songtheaws and boats was fraught with difficulties as there are no set times for anything and we would have to overnight in two towns. So less adventuresome, but more straightforward, the bus. This small bus took us along the windy road to Laos, over a mountain side, through Lao villages and often traveling over unpaved craggy roads that must be impassable with just a little rain. Minutes before we actually crossed the border Jack proceeded to vomit all over his lap. It was a surprise and we were unprepared. The driver’s attendant gave me a roll of toilet paper and a few plastic bags. I feel like cleaning up three cups of vomit the consistency of oatmeal with tissue should be some sort of master challenge on a game show. Add to that the pressure from the immigration police standing at your shoulder telling you to get off the bus and a shocked unwell twelve year old with snot running down his face holding a plastic bag of vomit…and you got a difficult task to complete. However, we made it and these stories of adversity only had color to our memories! Character right? A nice Thai couple that we met on the bus. Walked with us the mile into town at night when we got into LP. We are in Laos. Luang Prabang, a world Unesco site that was destroyed by Chinese mercenary armies in the late 1800s and only accepted French protection in 1888. The French brought Vietnamese immigrants to help rebuild Luang Prabang and the city became a popular escape for Parisians. Due to royalist alliances, Luang Prabang escaped ruin by the huge number of bombs dropped on Laos by the United States during the Vietnam war. The large French villas, once in disrepair are now revived and charging boutique prices with the influx of new money. The Luang Prabang airport only opened 13 years ago. Espresso and baguettes abound. Delicious baguette sandwiches for 10,000 kip, about $1.20. Add our favorite drink–blended ice,ginger,lime and mint and for $2.40 and you have a meal. I was here 20 years ago. It is very different now, motor bikes instead of bicycles, jeans instead of traditional skirts. More plastic garbage. However, still 33 temples packed into this small city! Monks robes hang to dry Old French Villa Laos is poorer, dirtier and rougher than Thailand. But along with this grime emerge old French villas next to large gold buddhas, amazing photo opportunities around every corner. We have observed in both Laos and Vietnam, countries with communist leadership, there is a tolerance for trash and rubble piles on the sidewalk and along the road. Our guess is maybe there less a sense of private responsibility as everything is owned collectively, or infrastructure and garbage collection are the government’s responsibility? Since we only scratch the surface in our understanding of the different places we visit we never really know. Filled with plastic bottles. Recycling I hope. Also, the capitalist drive to improve customer service and make money is literally asleep here, as shop keepers nap in their stores, often having to be wakened to buy something. The pace of service is very relaxed and slow. Tuk Tuk driver napping Sleeping soundly Often we have seven year olds waiting on us at restaurants and convenience stores. They are adept with a calculator and have thier basic english phrases down. This culture reminds me a little of Vietnam and I swear we hear “Chi Oi” amongst groups of women, or “hey you” in Vietnamese, but maybe we are imagining it. We have found a very inexpensive guest house along the river. It is an anomaly as lodging in this town is geared towards older tourists on group tour,new moneyed Chinese, and the prices reflect this. We are paying $24 a night for two rooms, however I feel like I am living in a Steinbeck novel. Cannery Row does come to mind. I think about cockroaches crawling over me at night and rats scurrying up the open drain in the bathroom. We have two adjoining rooms with doors that go out onto a balcony over the street. Our Guesthouse A saving grace is that although water stained and cracked, the ceilings are high and there is a window. Each room has carpet from the 1990s and threadbare sheets over single rock hard mattresses with heavy pillows that are weighed down by years of use. I am choosing to believe that everything is old and dingy, but clean? Recently? The outlets spark and lights flicker when you use them, but our doors go directly outside so escape from fire is quick. The bathroom is wet and smells sulfurous, the sink drains directly on the floor…however the shower water is warm, initially. Cork plays Jazz on his speaker and just having the music playing gives the place a sort of drug induced artist charm, one could even say Bohemian if you blur your vision by removing your glasses. Well after our first night’s sleep, no tell-tale bites. (I keep my fears and concerns to myself as the kids only complaint is that the WIFI is slow…which is the usual in all of Laos). I feel like this is a good test of my priviliged snobbery. However, two nights are adequate and tomorrow we move to a different guesthouse that we found along a quiet street near temples and our favorite restuarants. We worked out a discount and got the room down to $15 each a night and I am very happy to move there!

We will miss Thailand.  We spent three days in Nan, a far Northern province in Thailand that is unique autonomous history as it only became a part of Thailand in 1932. It is an ancient city, dating back to the 1400s, and the people consider themselves more Lao than Thai.

The name Nan is also used in Thailand as a name given to annoying, buck toothed, moon-faced children.

It is the most remote part of Thailand and only recently has a paved road that connects it to rest of Thailand.  There is no tourist infrastructure or English and we heavily relied on the kindness of our guesthouse host to help us navigate.  Suddenly, after having a break from traveling while living in Chiang Mai, we are thrown into again.  We are ready.

We decided to get a haircut for Jack.  It is always a unusual experience and there is  no English involved.  I think everyone gets the same haircut, the one the king has.

We are floored by the Thai generosity and kindness, as Noklake, our host, went above and beyond to help us…everything from picking us up at the bus station at 0400, arranging rides for us, taking us to temples and helping us buy bus tickets.  Our guesthouse cost $12 a room and was simple, yet comfortable.  Nan is really cool and we feel like we did not give it enough time.  We were able to meet our friends, Vaida and Ali and their kids Poppie and Johny for dinner which was so nice.  Maybe we will see them in Cambodia!

Now a new adventure, Laos.

What an amazing family.  I was introduced to the voice and life of Erik Hemingway and his family about two years ago when I discovered his podcast, Family Adventure Podcast.  His show is dedicated towards helping families make the big leap to travel and he interviews traveling families around the world.  This show provides inspiration, ideas and resources to families on the go.  In 2008 Erik and his wife Rachel traveled internationally for five years. They lived over a year in Costa Rica and three years on a 300 sft sailboat, sailing the Mediterranean and even crossing the Atlantic Ocean.  They currently have six children, spanning ages 7 to early 22 and live in North Carolina.  On the boat they sailed with five children, and Rachel had a sixth baby while in Israel.  Listening to the podcast, I would surround myself with the voices of families that Erik interviewed, creating a virtual community for myself while I planned our own exodus.  Unless you are planning a trip like this, the logistics and intricacies that fill your mind are of little interest to others.  I needed to hear the thoughts and ideas of people who had actually done it or were actively traveling with their families.  I knew that Erik and his family were planning a new trip to SE Asia starting in December.  I had been in email contact with him and hoped to connect with him and his family in Asia.  And we did!

Erik and Rachel are accompanied by Miles (7), Zoe (11), Lily (13) and Emma (17).

These children have visited over 25 countries and present a sophistication and worldliness that is uncanny.  They are really great, and Erik and Rachel have done a excellent job in creating generous, kind and interesting humans.  A parenting goal that we all have.  We really enjoyed being with them.  We met them for a few meals and also went on an adventure to see the Chiang Dao caves which was over a two-hour city bus ride outside of Chiang Mai.  We hitchhiked, rode in the back of truck, traded travel stories and watched the kids be silly together.  I am so happy to have met this very special family and hope our paths cross again.

Thank You Erik and Rachel for taking the time and energy to not only share your own story but also give a voice to all the families out there that have chosen the world to be the classroom which educates their children.  Like you I believe that cultural exchange is the best way to impart the values of love, generosity and acceptance.

More amazing images captured on our adventure to Chiang Dao

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We felt that it was important to show our children that 99.9% of the people in the  world are kind and generous and will go out of their way to help you.  We wanted to be peace ambassadors and show goodwill in our travels.  This trip is our way of protesting against the cruelty, bigotry and hatred that humans can show towards the “other”.  Human’s capacity for violence is matched only by our great capacity for kindness.  It is our wish that love prevails in 2018.

We are lucky to have found this gem.  It sits above a busy street in the old town and you can watch all the hustle from a lush patio filled with Thai antiques and plants, eating sticky rice and fried eggs, sipping hot Nescafe near the running fountain.   It is run by Ma, a generous woman with never-ending energy and good cheer that does everything to make sure that your every need is met.  For $15 a room, it is the best deal in town. We love it.

Ma and the many women that run her salon and guesthouses are so nice.  For example, I attempted all day to find a mortar and pestle, a large wooden one to make my favorite Som Tom Papaya salad.  We walked all day, went to five markets, no luck.  Finally I went to Ma.  Told her what I wanted, and she said that she could help me find it.  So I figured, in a couple of days…and I went home.  Literally 20 minutes later, two women on a motorbike brought me exactly what I had been looking for.  It was 250 baht or $8 (the women had got a deal as the price on the bottom was 280).  I was stunned.  The kind of generosity and kindness that the Thai people continually show us is awesome.

Plus the guesthouse is around the corner from our favorite park, Nong Buak Hard Park.  It is a city park heavily used by locals exercising, various ball games and French people practicing tight rope and arabesque yoga.  I attend free yoga in the mornings.  We go daily and play frisbee or practice a Thai form of hacky sack with a large plastic ball.  Takraw is the Thai word for the hand-woven rattan ball originally used in the game. It is essentially kickball played over a volleyball net ( you cannot use your hands) or men stand in a circle and kick it really high in order to get into a netted hoop and score points.  It is immensely popular and played in highly publicized matches for the king. The game looks easy but it is actually really hard and I am amazed that the control players have when they kick it.

For our last week in Chiang Mai we moved to Ma’s Guesthouse 2 and basically had a little open aired house to ourselves. We shared the common space with Alex, Aiden and Stephanie (our new friend from Germany).  It is a wonderful community and there is a lot of music as Alex plays the Viola and Uke and Aiden the guitar.  It is a wholesome scene here.

Being in Chiang Mai has actually been a break from traveling.  We found another home. We will miss it a lot.  I am sure we will be back.

We have reconnected with our friends that we met in Hanoi, Vaida and Ali, and their two children Poppy and Johnny.  In the past few days we have gathered for play, meals and then spent Christmas eve and Day together.  It lent our holiday a festive air.  Now they are off to explore Northern Thailand, but hopefully our paths will cross again.

We have also decided to not stay at Airbnbs any longer.  While it is nice to have our own home so to speak, the isolation from other travelers limits our experience.  We enjoy socializing and meeting others, and guesthouses and hostels grant us the opportunity to meet other travelers.  As well it is over twice the cost.  We meet the most interesting people as well.