Ben

by bochnerfamilyadventure

We found out yesterday that uncle Ben, Cork’s eldest brother had a massive stroke and died this morning. We struggle being so far away and feeling helpless. However, even the people there probably are feeling the same way. Waves of sadness, shock and ultimate loss hit us during the day, seemingly more poignant as we float in the Indian Ocean and experience the vastness of our world. We embraced this trip with the idea that one must enjoy the moment as life is fragile and can be shortened with little notice. Even from this distance we feel the vacuum as a large force has left us. Ben was our children’s biggest fan and he was always the first to comment on our blog. His love and support will be deeply missed. Our children cannot comprehend that he is gone. Death is a incomprehensible concept. We will miss him dearly.

11 thoughts on “Ben”

  1. Oh you guys I am so sorry to read this. Oddly enough I did get to meet Ben last summer when he dropped the kids off here one day. I already “knew of” him from Jackson’s ancestry project so I asked if he was the skater or the musician. He said he was not the skater. My heart hurts for you all, I’m sure he’s left you with many, many fun memories.

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  2. I am so sorry for your loss. Know that he is in a place of perfect love, and he will always be near you.
    Sincerely,
    Molly Burton

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  3. Oh man you guys. My heart is with you always but especially now. Jack and Addie, you are the future and are so important to all of us. I hope that you can find solace in the beauty that is our world and that you are in the middle of. When feeling loss I often look at nature and breathe deep breaths, it sounds corny but the people we love are in there. This is our universe together. I find it helpful to look in all directions but in tough times I also try to remember to look in front of my nose. Breathing really helps. I love you very much.

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  4. We have been thinking of Ben all day and are so sad about his passing. This must be so hard for you all. When I last spoke with him last, during your tour of SE Asia he was concerned about Cork’s fever, your safety. We are all so sad and wonder how we can help.

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  5. If I remember correctly, Ben was the highlight of our little Hanukkah celebration last year, running the Dreydl game and keeping Jackson from scamming everybody. At my age, I expect to see news of loved ones passing, and of course, difficult as it was (and still is, from time to time), I was prepared for it when Faith died. But this must be especially hard on the kids, who are having such an adventure and growing so fast, but still too young to deal with death. On the other hand, they already have a much better picture of the world and its vast beauty than I ever will, so maybe they can see this as part of the really big picture. I will make a point to celebrate shabbat this Friday with Seiza (“Shoshanna” is her Hebrew name) and remember Ben as we light the candles. Instead of the “thoughts and prayers” thing we hear so much these days, I will offer the Jewish Travelers Prayer:
    May it be Your will, G‑d, our G‑d and the G‑d of our fathers, that You should lead us in peace and direct our steps in peace, and guide us in peace, and support us in peace, and cause us to reach our destination in life, joy, and peace and return us in peace. Save us from every enemy and ambush, from robbers and wild beasts on the trip, and from all kinds of punishments that rage and come to the world. May You confer blessing upon the work of our hands and grant me grace, kindness, and mercy in Your eyes and in the eyes of all who see us, and bestow upon us abundant kindness and hearken to the voice of our prayer, for You hear the prayers of all. Blessed are You G‑d, who hearkens to prayer.
    Amin.

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